I've been doing some thinking, . . .

One of my (favorite) classes has a special technique that they use when they're asking me for a favor. If we have an extra five minutes or if they particularily don't want to do something, they have learned the art of asking nicely. It goes something like this:

"Teacher, let's play Uno!"
"Well, I don't know, we still have five minutes, . . . "
"Please, pretty Tinkerbell!"

I'm not joking, they really say that! We a request like that, how can I refuse?!

I was watching tv the other day and I happened to see a program on the English language Korean channel. It was an interview with two Psychology professors discussing psycho-analysis. They inevitably talked about the recent shooting at Virginia Tech and how psycho-analysis could or could not have predicted the shooting. One of the interviewees mentioned that one of the warning signs was when the shooter closed himself off from society and stopped communicating with others. He said something about how when this happens, it's a sign that an individual is no longer socialized to the environment around him. (It was something like this. I can't, obviously, remember the exact wording and professionals may be laughing their heads off/rolling in their graves as I type.)

Anyway, as a result of the show, I decided to get off my arse and actively pursue a social life. When Jae Cheol is working at nights, I come home and spend a lonely night by myself. Well, no more! One of the consequences of a language barrier is a feeling of isolation or separation from the rest of society. When the only interaction I have with Koreans is negative, (see previous post,) it is easy to feel picked on and persecuted. Well, I obviously can't change their behaviour, but I can change mine, which will in turn, affect how I react to assholes. In short, I am going on the assumption that if I am happier, I won't be as bothered when people are jerks. Well, we'll see about that.

Living in a homogeneous society

I went to the gym this morning and really enjoyed myself. I felt good emotionally and physically. As I was walking down the stairs after work today, a middle-school boy I don't know walked behind me singing, "it's the Big Show" over and over again.

Being a foreigner in Korea means that people stare and comment about me on a daily basis. Being an overweight foreigner means that people occasionally say nasty hurtful things to me. It's very hard to take. I don't know how long I want to stay in Korea now. I am a good person and this repeated verbal abuse that I receive regularily is just not worth it. It makes me defensive and nasty. I don't recognize myself in how angry I have become. When I listen to myself speak to other people in my day to day life, I know that they are hearing a bitter, nasty person.

Possibly the funniest thing I've ever heard.

"Teacher, who is Jae Cheol?"

"My husband."

"Teacher, married?"

"Yes."

"Teacher, baby?"

"No."

"Teacher, why? When married?"

"2005."

"What? Teacher, why no baby? You're really married?"

Baby in the house

My tiny little sweetie pie and his mom came to visit us at our place.



He touched everything, rounded up anything that was brightly coloured and put it in a bag because it was now his. I couldn't believe the carnage and had to have a nap after he left.

The next day I woke up and I missed him already. He's perfect. I taught him how to use a water gun! This is what qualifies me as an aunt and not a mum.

Nah-nah-nah-nah Nah-nah-nah-nah FISHING!

It's a little lake but it's pretty. We want to get in there.

This is what the boat looks like after three trips from the car. The instructions say it only takes 10 minutes to assemble. Excellent, lets get going.

The friggin thing is huge! An hour later, we were ready to go. Damn good thing we didn't bother trying it in the apartment like we (ahem, not me, just him) suggested.

It works! We're boating AND catching fish!

The news we've all been waiting for, . . .

The agonizing wait is over. The winner is, . . .

It was so confusing because everything was in Korean

Well thank goodness for Melissa. Whenever I have a problem in Korea, she's the one to ask, since it's often the case that she's encountered it too and already figured out the solution.

Did you know, that Melissa was the first person who was nice to me in Korea? Well, it's true. After a harrowing 50 or so hours in this new and strange land, having been unceremoniously dumped, or rather, "dropped off" by my director on Thurs night and told that I start Monday, I had begun talking to myself and was convinced that another few hours might actually see me losing my mind.

The potent sewer smell, the humidity, the typhoon, the jet lag and that weird sound that I could hear coming from a neighboring apartment's ventilation duct that sounded like bicycle brakes, had all begun to take their toll. I was quickly going mad.

I had just walked to the beach, (not the lovely local you would imagine, so don't get your hopes up,) and thought I would take a chance and speak to the two white girls I saw walking there with young Korean guys. When I said, "hello, do you speak English?" and was told in reply "No." I was really confused and began walking home. On the way, I saw two other white girls walking in my direction. I nearly didn't bother saying hello, but in the end I did and thank goodness for that. When they replied that they did speak English, I burst into tears. That's when Melissa took me under her wing.

So, to make a long story short, Melissa came to the rescue once again to explain to me how to change the language from Korean to English so that I could figure out what Blogger was trying to tell me every time I wanted to post. So there. Or, so here. I am. Back.

New title, An ode to Melissa

If you think that's crazy, . . .

. . . I just saw, on tv, a show called a "fake reality show". I'm not even going to dignify that with a comment.

Once again proving my point that I am living in the land that logic forgot.

You want me to do what?

My question for you is this: Does weird shit happen at home, but I just don't realize it's weird?

Jae Cheol got a phone call today from an old friend he hadn't seen in ages. This friend needed his help, or more specifically, his wife's help. That would be me.

Apparently, the friend is getting married in July. The thing is, his fiance has an ex-boyfriend who just doesn't get it. This guy has, can you believe it, called her! Why did they need my help, you ask. Well, apparently this guy is Chinese, studying in New Zealand, which is where the girl met him. I had to call this guy to explain in English why he could no longer call the girl. I was required to explain that this message had been passed down from the girl's father. The crazy thing is that it had! Yes, that's right, the father had taken Jae Cheol's friend aside to ask him to speak to the ex-boyfriend because he wanted to "protect his family."

So I called the guy and I felt like a rat the entire time I was talking to him. Jae Cheol tried all night to talk some sense into his "friend", especially after he told us that now he doesn't trust his girlfriend and is getting back at her by having a little something on the side!

This is all too much for me. I'm going to go spend some time reading Us Magazine. Celebrity entertainment is going to be a relaxing walk in the park compared to this lunacy.

Garden variety

Plants, plants, plants. I FINALLY bought some plants. I have been meaning to do it for quite some time now, but I just didn't make it a priority. Well, now I've gone and done it. I went to a lovely greenhouse near my school and bought three plants. I've also got my eye on a dozen more . . . and a tree. I love the smell of a greenhouse. It's not so much a smell as perfect air. A house (or tiny bachelor apartment,) is not a home without plants.

From the Botanical Garden Greenhouse in Montreal.

The Finished Product

Yes, that's right, it's very bare. We didn't have much choice as to where to put the furniture due to drafty windows and cable/electricity outlets. Whatever, it's nice because there's lots of space and I don't feel squished and cramped. Now that we've "unpacked" we're probably going to have to move next weekend. Mark my words, . . .

I just finished reading Beauty Tips from Moose Jaw by Will Ferguson. I really enjoyed it. I haven't seen much of Canada and this book has planted the seeds of an idea. It's fun being a tourist in your own country, especially since Canada is bigger than most countries. The best thing about the book is that it tells you the history of the places that the author writes about. That's exactly what I want to know when I'm traveling. I'm just going to stop talking because I'm not very articulate at 9:13pm. It's time to go to bed. Read this book and read too, The Lizard Cage by Karen Connelly. It will make you cry. I also bought Oryx and Crake by Margaret Atwood and it is a scary book. The environment's going to hell in a handbasket and this is where we're headed. I couldn't finish it. Too scary.

Any book suggestions? I don't want fluff, I want something intelligent. (This Book Will Change Your Life notwithstanding.)

Found it

A-ha! Mr. I-don't-know-where-it-is-I-didn't-see-it-or-touch-it and I have (finally) unpacked our boxes and decorated (a little bit). It's a wonderful feeling to be able to find all of my stuff but oh my goodness do I have a lot of stuff!

In the process of unpacking etc, we came across our camera cord, surprise, surprise. It "somehow" ended up in a box on the veranda. Here are the long awaited pictures of everything important.



First of all, the ever exciting Dong Jun, 2-year-old extrodinaire!

Then Kumiko and Sung Hyuk who were in Jae Cheol's English class in Canada.

Friends of Jae Cheol's getting married. They didn't know we were back and therefore got a surprised picture of the bride saying, and I quote, "oh, Melanie!"

Just for fun, looking forward to my 31th birthday next year!

(After finding the camera cord, it was then time to look for the actual camera in our newly reorganized apartment. Do you think we could find it? No. Do you think I blamed Jae Cheol? Yes. Do you think it was actually his fault? Not this time. . .)

Random thoughts

In no particular order:

• I love my eyebrows these days
• celebrity news entertainment makes me LAUGH
• we're out of cereal, a point which I only remember when I wake up in the morning so far away from a grocery store
• everything on my computer's in Korean
• I wonder what kind of stuff there is to see and do in Hong Kong for a weekend, . . .

Hayden, glorious Hayden!

I went to visit Melissa, Dong Jin and Hayden yesterday and the baby is absolutely even perfecter in person! Seriously, she's gorgeous, hilarious and smart as a fox. Alas, no camera cord so no pictures.

I want to throw a big, fat, hysterical, kicking, screaming, crying tantrum. I am so angry and it's all my f*#%ing fault.

Our computer died in Canada but before it did, I "copied" all of our pictures onto a cd. Turns out, I didn't. It didn't happen. The cd and my computer lied. I got nothin'. Nothing.

Hence the tantrum.

F2

I forgot to mention that I got my wife-visa with no hassle. All we did was show up and present the required documents. I got the visa and my ID card ten days later. In two years I will automatically become a landed immigrant. Very exciting.

uh oh, I have an idea, . . .

I've been looking at my pictures from Cambodia and Vietnam recently and I'm getting itchy feet again! (Don't tell my mom!!!!!!!) Update: Mom, don't worry. I'm not going anywhere.

It's true, I'm not going anywhere anytime soon. Well, not another country that is. We may actually be moving soon. Or at least, that's what I've been led to believe. Jae Cheol and I are currently living in a bachelor apartment again but we've been told that should something bigger become available in the spring, we're going to move then. Well, that IS good, great and wonderful except for the fact that I want to unpack, decorate and make curtains NOW.

When we were in Canada I didn't really decorate cause I knew it was only going to be for a year. I absolutely restrained myself from buying housewares and that wasn't easy because I LOVE buying housewares. It just didn't make sense since I knew we were going to have to come back with all of our stuff packed into baggage restrictions. Well that is no longer the case now and I want to become domestic. I want to buy a comfy chair for reading and put it in the perfect spot. I want to invite people over and serve them delicious drinks or nachos. I want to have a place to put all of my linens and have enough hangers and closet space. The problem is that I'M STILL LIVING OUT OF A FRIGGEN' SUITCASE AND IT'S MAKING ME CRAZY!

I may just go ahead and decorate. TAKE THAT! My sanity's at stake here. And besides, moving from one house to another in the same city only requires putting everything you have into as many boxes as it takes. I can handle that. I won't mind doing it. It's the baggage restrictions and having to carry it all with you at once that's unappealing and will never be repeated, this I vow. (I had to, Jae Cheol made me do it.) Yes, that's right. I will never move all of my stuff from one country to another again! I won't have to, I've discoverd the convenience of international shipping. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Oh yeah, I still can't find the computer cord so there will be no new pictures at this time.

Lazy arse

I haven't been as inspired to blog since I stopped being forced to sit in front of the computer everyday. Well, that's not true, I wrote something truly funny and inspirational with a picture of the grandfather-baby, but apparently Blogger disapproved and destroyed it. Let's try again.

First update: I turned 30, Yippee.

Jae Cheol and I arrived in Korea on the eve of my 30th b.day. We decided to drink immediately after bringing our giant luggage up to the 4th floor walk up. Apparently we were so excited to be back in Korea that we drank ourselves stupid and my actual birthday was spent in my new apartment's bathroom. Happy Birthday to me.


(Please note the thousands of bottles of soju on the table. I'm surprised I'm not blind!)








Well, I've fully recovered and am really enjoying my new job here in Korea. I took this job because I had a feeling that I would enjoy working here and it's all working out swimmingly. Jeff and Julia are both wonderful teachers and really supportive and fun to work with. I have a key to the school and I sometimes come in early to prepare extra stuff for my classes. It's exactly how I thought it would be. *sigh*

Jae Cheol and I have visited the fam at least every weekend and they are a riot. Well, mostly the baby is a riot. I've nicknamed him "screamy baby". That's because every time I visit, the first time he sees me he screams with delight! There's no better sound than that, let me tell you! I have translated it into: "oh goody, the fun is here!" I will post all of the pictures that I have taken of him when I find the camera-computer cord.

Jae Cheol is currently searching for a job. He's had two interviews and is stressed out like I've never seen him. He is also obsessed with keeping our (bachelor) apartment clean. Everytime I leave the house, the stuff I had gets put away in weird places, (hence not being able to find the camera-computer cord.) I only thank him for his cleaning because I'm afraid he may explode otherwise.

I am definitely happy about my decision to come back to Korea. The job says it all. I miss everybody though and you know who you are. Big kisses!

An Embarrassment of Riches

Since we have been packing and getting ready to move to Korea, we're trying to get rid of everything. The other day some of our old clothes found their way to reception house in Ottawa where new immigrants stay when they first arrive.

A classmate of Jae Cheol's who is a Burmese refugee has kept in contact with the reception house and they call him anytime there is a new arrival from Burma. Last night he came to our house with a new arrival who had been in Canada for 40 days. Apparently he and 19 members of his family came to Canada after living in a refugee camp on the Thai border for over 10 years. He is 27 years old and is married with three little kids. We were able to give him some kitchen things and a tv.

When they left, I cried. It was the most humbling experience of my life. I wanted to do more. I have never felt so guilty in my life about the privileges that I was born to. I have never been hungry. I have never had to fear for my safety or that of my family. I have never had to flee from my home. I don't know exactly what this family has been through, I only know that they were very happy to take what we could give them, however embarrassingly meager, mismatched and used they were.

I heard a radio program about two women in Ottawa who pick up gently used furniture and distribute it to newly arrived immigrants. They make pickups every Wednesday night by appointment. They can be contacted via email at helpingwithfurniture(at)hotmail.com. If you live in Ottawa, maybe you'll one day be in a position to contact these ladies and donate something.

Now that I'm ready to go back to work in Korea, I'm wondering whether or not it would be possible to squeeze a little sun and surf in somewhere. It's absolutely not going to happen, but one can always dream, (while checking out airfares when one should be filing, . . . )